I once had to shoot my dog.
It had been run over and was in agony, so I borrowed a pistol and shot it. There was no vet in a hundred miles and its back was clearly broken ….
That was really just a hard place. Someone else offered to do it, but I felt that it was my problem to resolve. So I did it.
It was the right decision, but the sickening feeling and the guilty relief occasionally stab my well being. Sweet Hector!
There is no real unscarred escape from hard dilemmas, other than mental preparation and a rational analysis of solutions. There must be acknowledgement that hurt will occur and that pain will endure for some time.
The difficult part is ensuring that feelings of guilt are voided by a sensible assessment and choice of outcome.
When a problem is shared, the pain is doubled…
If the solution is not shared and owned, recriminations can rear their head later with even more pain. Negotiation and the gaining of acceptance of others is an extremely delicate exercise, with horrific emotional pitfalls both in the solution and the forever after.
To say that one emerges stronger from a distressing dilemma may be true, but strength is probably not the right measure; wiser perhaps?
So next time your leg is pinned by a rock, don’t cut it off until you are sure there isn’t a handy lever nearby or passer-by who could lift it.
sillysocksonfriday 